Thursday, December 21, 2006

First I wasn’t blogging because I didn’t have a lot to say. Then I was having trouble posting photos on my dad’s PC (still am – no problem on my mum’s laptop but she’s had it at work this week – but why the difference?!). Then I sort of had too much to say. And then my brain exploded.

I fell into a pit of despair this weekend – this move was a big mistake, I can’t deal with the stress, we have no income and increasing outgoings. And I got felled by some sinus thingy on Monday and I didn’t really get out of bed. And Oliver’s sick so he’s not sleeping so well due to the coughing. So I am tired and depressed and whatever.

And then yesterday came and I got my job and Mark got some very good job news as well (no offer but he’s making great connections and people are keeping him in mind for opportunities in the new year and at this very moment he’s meeting with people at a major company). Except I sort of haven’t got my job as they can’t get a hold of my references (people, it’s Christmas, everyone in England is already off work in my world) and I am really worried I am going to lose it.

So hurray, we have succeeded! But THE STRESS IS INFINITE. I couldn’t sleep, I didn’t sleep until like 4am last night. What are we going to do when we are both working? I am so happy to be offered this job I wanted, with its salary very comparable to what I was making in London but you know without the crazy cost of living, and it’s a good, important, government job. But OLIVER. Both parents out of the house 12 hours a day if we are still living in Oshawa and both working. He won’t even know us. We’ll be lucky if we get to say good morning and good night to him. Why did we have a kid if someone else is going to raise him? The dog. Doggy day care?

Christ. Anyway, no references probably means no job so what I am worried about. At least tomorrow, I am going to stay with my grandparents and my grandmother is going to stuff me full of her wonderful food for a week and I will stress eat to my heart’s content. So I am signing off until the 28th or so, when we have the Big Birthday Weekend (Mark and Oliver). Happy holidays.

2 Responses to “”

  1. Sandy Kerr Says:

    Detox Em, this stress will be worse on occasion and less on others, its what mothers get. The ups and downs once you get working are only going to add up, but they will also diminish on occasion as well. We all sympathize as we’ve been there, done that etc. You will survive and so will Oliver and Pepper, but it won’t be easy. IF you can hold off on final decision making (use the’sick’cold as your excuse) hopefully Mark’s offer will come through and then you can buy your house and make it a home without going to work just now. Major stress moving…not to mention starting a new job and finding sitters or day care as well. Wish you lots of luck on your decision and choices. Enjoy your holidays, rest and relax. xo

  2. Sueellen Says:

    Just getting caught up, congrats on getting the job!

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