Thursday, January 18, 2007

I suppose the fact that I haven’t burst into tears yet today, for the first time this week, is some sort of positive sign?

I think it has a lot to do with the fact that I do have a fantastic workplace, although new to me, with people who are very supportive and understanding, in particular my manager. They have no problem with my completely inflexible working hours, and that is fantastic. I don’t want to be that person who always has to leave at a certain time and who has to stay home ’cause their kid is sick, but I have to be. And thankfully they seem okay with it!

I still, of course, don’t know if we are going to be able to manage with both of us working full time and commuting. We haven’t had to deal with all that yet.

I haven’t really been able to deal with anything anyway, because I’m sort of barely even existing outside the workplace right now. I have to go to bed early to get up early. I haven’t eaten dinner a couple of nights. I’ve got a bit of a cold (either due to Oliver germs from daycare or new commuting/office germs). And I don’t have a lot of time to watch tv or read the newspaper or do any kind of little things that need doing.

And you know what? When I was at home for a year, feeling stuck at home most of the time, the days just flew by despite the fact it seemed I got little accomplished. Now, having to do so much in a day, the days are tortuously dragging on. It feels like I’ve been there ages, not just a few days. It’s a complete cliche, but thank god it’s Friday tomorrow.

2 Responses to “”

  1. Suburban Mum Says:

    I’m sure it will get easier – or at least seem easier – once you get used to it again. It’s all very new and different to what you’re used to at the moment! Good luck hon and hope you feel better soon (I sympathise, I have a stinker of a cold).

  2. Sandy Kerr Says:

    You know what you are experiencing is called “LIFE”. No I don’t mean to sound ‘snarky’ but thats what it is. You are ‘anxious’ because you have a dream job and want it to work. You are ‘anxious’ because you have a darling son and want to be there for him. You are ‘anxious’ because there just isn’t enough hours in the day to do all that needs to be done, or that you want to do, or think you have to do. You know what, Tami gave me a book to read years ago and its called “Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff and Its All Small Stuff” perhaps you should read that on the ‘Go Train’ and then stop analysing the unimportant fears or worries. Everything WILL become easier as the days progress. Just take it easy dear.

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